On Sunday, on the way to church Addison was talking about babies and said to me a time or two "Mom, remember when I was in your tummy".... and I was avoiding the subject with her-- I just would say, "Yes, I remember when you were a baby".... Adoption is something we've discussed with her in the past, but I just don't know how often we need to talk about it or how she feels when we talk about it or ??? So I kind of ignored the topic when she brought it up.
Then while continuing to drive I decided I needed to say something about it. So I said to her "Addison, do you remember what adopted is?" and she said "no, do you know what it means mom?" :) I told her I do know what it means and went on to explain that she grew in someone else's tummy-- not mine. But that Mommy & Daddy picked her special to be their daughter and that it's a very special thing, etc... She kept looking at me while I talked about it with her.... then she asked something that she's never asked before. She said "What did you name me?"-- I told her that the lady whose tummy she grew in named her Addison, but that we wanted her middle name to be Grace after Daddy's grandma Grace. She was quiet for a minute and then said "Why didn't that lady name me something better like Beana?" (this is an imaginary name she uses a lot pronounced "Bean" "a") ........... :)
Oh the mind of a 5-year-old. And that was the end of the conversation. A 5-year-old grasps it so differently and it's so hard as an adoptive mom to know exactly how to explain things to her and to know when to say things and when to let it go.
